tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8770341086445997547.post7071075294321512238..comments2023-10-07T22:37:49.244+13:00Comments on The Hand Mirror: Sex is not just a book by Madonnakatyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15742280289613450293noreply@blogger.comBlogger21125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8770341086445997547.post-12712315863778239952009-07-16T23:52:59.286+12:002009-07-16T23:52:59.286+12:00Fabulous, although mine are still too young to hea...Fabulous, although mine are still too young to hear this info too. I hope I think this clearheadedly in 13 or 15 years' time. <br /><br />I suspect their first question will be, 'Who's Madonna?'<br /><br />Shaun: I would argue that the primary function of sex is connection and intimacy and relationship cohesion - otherwise we would have evolved to procreate in some much more prosaic way, like plants. Biologically, yes, heterosexuals of childbearing age do happen to occasionally procreate when they have sex. But that is not what sex is "about".Stegetroniumhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15881823966680751798noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8770341086445997547.post-79106839217704005142009-07-06T17:03:17.793+12:002009-07-06T17:03:17.793+12:00I think it's an interesting post, and certainl...I think it's an interesting post, and certainly a great idea to think hard about what you want to say before the erectile problems ad on the TV forces the issue... <br /><br />I would take a couple of issues though, in addition to the ones already listed.<br /><br />First, from a biological standpoint, sex is of course primarily about procreation. Pleasure is what drives and motivates us, but not what it's primary function is. As complex social animals, we use that pleasure for more than procreation, but they are still different things.<br /><br />Second, I would promote the safe sex in point the fifth pretty much to first on the list. Very important I think to remove the risk from the inevitable sexual experiments of youth, and the worst outcome of much sexual repression is the denial that leads to unprotected sex and its consequences. So how about point the first being: protect yourself?Shaunnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8770341086445997547.post-68757705744466173042009-07-03T20:49:10.387+12:002009-07-03T20:49:10.387+12:00Beautifully written.
Keep up the good work.Beautifully written.<br />Keep up the good work.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8770341086445997547.post-36634346603507515462009-07-03T16:03:38.672+12:002009-07-03T16:03:38.672+12:00Thanks for the feedback, I hope to get back to thi...Thanks for the feedback, I hope to get back to this on the weekend with some meatier comments, but in the meantime I just wanted to clarify one thing. A lot of people seem to have jumped to the conclusion that Wriggly is a girl. Actually he's not. And I didn't deliberately write this as advice to a girl, or a boy, or to both, I just wrote what I thought. The fact that the gender isn't obvious is something I didn't even think about until I'd posted it.<br /><br />The Cleo and Dolly references reflect the fact that I was once a girl ;-) Are there any equivalents for boys/men that actually have decent sex advice?Juliehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08977150346842277994noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8770341086445997547.post-6825923814420976012009-07-03T15:26:08.641+12:002009-07-03T15:26:08.641+12:00A truly wonderful bit of advice.
If more people h...A truly wonderful bit of advice.<br />If more people had this talk, with this advice, the world would be a better place.Bokhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07409527708105395438noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8770341086445997547.post-7882434258328396232009-07-03T14:44:31.271+12:002009-07-03T14:44:31.271+12:00Well since you're wondering about all the lurk...Well since you're wondering about all the lurkers I'll chime in and say I too think it's an excellent post, though I'd certainly strongly endorse Deborah's addendum about honouring commitments. If everyone did that there'd be a <i>lot</i> less angst in the world.<br /><br />As an aside, I see comments about the age at which young people are "ready" for this information. I'd suggest that that coincides precisely with the time they becomne curious about it, whether they're 8 or 18.Rex Widerstromnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8770341086445997547.post-57902558480498596262009-07-03T14:09:44.736+12:002009-07-03T14:09:44.736+12:00Awesome post, has given me a kick in the guts over...Awesome post, has given me a kick in the guts over the social taboos adopted that hinder my own sex life - I'm off to buy some sexy lingerie. At what age do you think you might be giving this letter to Wriggly? Mine are 13 and 15. This 13yo is too young for this info, and 15yo probably right age but has steady boyfriend and this might seem a licence to "go for it"? Is(n't) there a moral code anywhere?Shadynoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8770341086445997547.post-35226970774228963642009-07-03T14:04:53.304+12:002009-07-03T14:04:53.304+12:00I don't agree with all the others.
1. it's...I don't agree with all the others.<br />1. it's fantastic and I recommend as much as you can get inside marriage.<br />2. if you haven't slept around and neither has your beau then you both will be safe from stds and aids.<br />3. It's all in the mind and the deeper and freer your relationship with your beau the better and longer it will be.<br />4. Grandad was right, Character counts no matter the gender.<br />5. Granny was right, be very wary of people without moral boundaries, they are toxic to your mind and family though they won't necessarily seem it at first.<br />MikeNZAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8770341086445997547.post-73421338930033306372009-07-03T13:16:29.574+12:002009-07-03T13:16:29.574+12:00Earlier this week, due to a tv ad about men's ...Earlier this week, due to a tv ad about men's problems, which appeared in prime time, my 10 year-old daughter turned to me and asked, "What's an erection?"<br /><br />I flailed about umming and aahing. Then another shot came up with some guy getting hit with something where it hurts. So I made some limp comment about, well, you see that guy. He will be having problems with getting one right now.<br /><br />Which she seemed happy with. But I felt like a complete crock.<br /><br />It isn't easy because you fear telling them something they are not ready to hear. And a mother's instincts are to protect.Lindsay Mitchellhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04437693272797130833noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8770341086445997547.post-50316403560529838192009-07-03T12:26:18.310+12:002009-07-03T12:26:18.310+12:00Stargazer & David cover everything I'd say...Stargazer & David cover everything I'd say about this post :)<br /><br />Based on the Cleo and Dolly references, I'm assuming Wriggly is a girl. Regardless, I reckon its valid for both my 2 boys and 1 daughter (2 years between oldest and youngest), so I'm going to show this to Mrs E, and we will steal what we can (imitation being the sincerest form of flattery and all that...).Martin Englishhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00353135329046627049noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8770341086445997547.post-86607100822987508972009-07-03T12:02:12.560+12:002009-07-03T12:02:12.560+12:00I still have not really talked to my kids about se...I still have not really talked to my kids about sex. I mean they know the mechanics - but the other stuff - I am not sure if I should talk to them about it or just let them find out about it. Sex is a doing thing rather than a talking about it thing. Good post.brian_smallerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05402642885274753098noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8770341086445997547.post-78919831118560559272009-07-02T18:16:06.031+12:002009-07-02T18:16:06.031+12:00It's really well written.
Far better than my ...It's really well written.<br /><br />Far better than my Form 1 PE teacher who put on a video of a woman giving birth and said "this is what happens if you have sex", and you knew that for lots of kids that was the only info they'd ever had re sex...Moana Mackeynoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8770341086445997547.post-75787060548560841762009-07-02T14:10:10.092+12:002009-07-02T14:10:10.092+12:00What a sensible well written post.What a sensible well written post.David Farrarhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16671886921725110921noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8770341086445997547.post-89169708040526171702009-07-02T14:00:19.637+12:002009-07-02T14:00:19.637+12:00Yes to all of that.Yes to all of that.surayahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03424892350582563508noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8770341086445997547.post-65383313332112474592009-07-02T12:06:29.744+12:002009-07-02T12:06:29.744+12:00It's an excellent post, Julie, and it's pu...It's an excellent post, Julie, and it's pushed my thinking along in a couple of places. Mostly about sex being just plain good fun, and extra nice if it's with someone you love very much.<br /><br />I wonder if adding something about not breaking commitments might be good i.e. along the lines that if you have promised someone that you will have a sexually exclusive relationship with them, then it is at least polite to renegotiate that <i>before</i> you have sex outside that relationship. But that's probably more to do with managing relationships well rather than with sex itself.Deborahhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14182573274494086468noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8770341086445997547.post-4161715948628300332009-07-02T11:51:52.330+12:002009-07-02T11:51:52.330+12:00I'm thinking of printing it out and giving it ...I'm thinking of printing it out and giving it to my child to read. Nicely put!.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8770341086445997547.post-39722805882562195232009-06-30T09:19:09.421+12:002009-06-30T09:19:09.421+12:00definitely like it! but you've written it so ...definitely like it! but you've written it so well that there's not much to add :)stargazerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00430290445762377335noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8770341086445997547.post-63103102803035813702009-06-30T08:26:15.785+12:002009-06-30T08:26:15.785+12:00Thanks for the feedback. I'm finding it reall...Thanks for the feedback. I'm finding it really weird that this post is getting a lot of hits but only three comments so far. Does that mean people like it or loathe it?!Juliehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08977150346842277994noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8770341086445997547.post-61608305636798079542009-06-29T11:01:36.405+12:002009-06-29T11:01:36.405+12:00Can I steal this speech and use it for my future s...Can I steal this speech and use it for my future son or daughter?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8770341086445997547.post-73610970925079332582009-06-28T22:25:24.246+12:002009-06-28T22:25:24.246+12:00You know it's interesting, I don't know Wr...You know it's interesting, I don't know Wriggly's gender (probably just due to ignorance on my part) and I actually can't tell from reading this.DPF:TLDRhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06372937855256319716noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8770341086445997547.post-11225579691812242172009-06-28T20:17:30.314+12:002009-06-28T20:17:30.314+12:00I hope that by the time you're looking around ...<i>I hope that by the time you're looking around there won't be the stupid social taboos around sex that currently exist...</i><br /><br />I entertain the odd forlorn hope myself! I've been having an interesting dispute over at No Minister over whether Berlusconi is a "real man" for thinking the real pleasure of sex is about "conquest." Don't hold out any great hopes about that shit disappearing anytime soon is all I can say.Psycho Milthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00779500926576047736noreply@blogger.com