victims

i read this post by dr sapna samant today, in response to a discussion on the aotearoa ethnic network (see here if you'd like to sign up).

while i'm not interested in the substantive discussion around payment of extra's and the response of the group to it, i've been thinking about the "victim mentality" sapna talks about. i'd have to admit that her post grated on my nerves, and it took me a while to work out why.

it's because this is one of those concepts, like "political correctness", which is used to silence dissent. so when a group is pointing out, for example, instances of racism or seeking redress for past wrongs, they're told to snap out of their victim mentality. complaining is seen as whining; we're told that we're living in the past, we need to put that past behind us and just move on. except the one's usually telling us to move on are the ones who would have to face a consequence should justice actually be done.

of course, some in the minority group (the alan duffs and john tamaheres of this world for example), will join in, telling their own people that it's time to snap out of victimhood, to stop looking for handouts and stand on their own two feet. i just hate the language, the concepts, the framing of this argument. seeking justice is not equivalent to expecting a handout. and seeking justice does involve going over past wrongs, it involves dwelling on the negatives and hence it does inflame passions.

we need that inflamation, firstly to encourage action, secondly to ensure that the same wrongs don't keep occurring. i can accept that there is a point when we need to move on, but that point only comes when justice has been done and real change has been achieved.

it's interesting that this term "victimhood mentality" is not used in terms of gender issues. i'm not sure why. we tend to accept that women have been victims and have been victimised. seeking justice has been a difficult process; seeking to change societal attitudes has been a struggle. but the complaint against women these days is not that we're victims, but that we have too much power. that claim is based on the fact that a few high-profile women have achieved positions of power, and that boys are doing badly at school compared to girls.

yet it seems that many women still feel powerless. i know that i often do. i feel powerless against the increasing sexualisation of women in advertising, music videos and many tv programmes. i feel powerless against the constant messages telling women how they should look and how they should think if they want to be acceptable. it's difficult to get across an alternative message, and those who try are treated badly. yet even though i feel powerless, i don't feel entirely helpless. at the least, i can say how i feel in as many forums as possible, on-line or in real life. it might not change the world, but it might make a few people stop and think.

it's important to speak out when injustice is occurring. i love the way the women at PAS are quick to point out when there's sexism or misogyny. this does not come from being victims, but from being empowered, from feeling strong enough to speak out. and i think that is why i disagree with sapna's post. the concerns expressed on the issue she discussed came from people that were feeling strong, not feeling weak or victimised.

having said all that, i must make clear that i love sapna's writing, and the fact that she's never afraid to raise issues that many of us steer clear of, out of politeness or sometimes lack of courage. it just happens that in this case, i disagree with her.