Jake Paringatai is the latest high-profile sports player caught assualting a woman. He pleaded guilty and was fined by the judge. However what makes my teeth grind is the reporting of the crime, just a clumsy drunken grope that only lasted a few secods. Jesus christ, you stick your fingers up a woman's vagina without her say so, that's what called rape. I don't care if you are up there for a few seconds or a few hours, if she don't want it up there it's rape pure and simple.
I'm thinking of keeping score of how many of these stories we see this year.
Warning: some readers may find the contents of this comment thread triggering. J
12 comments:
I'm thinking of keeping score of how many of these stories we see this year.
That could be very disheartening.
Ye gads, that article is absolutely awful too. It's all about this poor guy, no mention of the harm to the victim at all.
Lauredhel has a zinger of a post up about it: "He's just a rich rapist who has suffered enough"
It seemed like the judge was saying it wasn't REALLY his fault since “There was hypocrisy in the community being happy that these young men were paid large sums of money, and consistently telling them they were wonderful. It was hardly surprising if Paringatai ended up with an inflated idea of his own importance.”
Pfft it's never their fault is it?
Absolutely disgusting that the media will call this a drunken grope, it reminds me of the incident in Wellington, where several rugby union players assaulted a woman, and TVNZ called it hijinks at the Hilton.
I really think though this is about the media protecting the precious NZRFU, if it hadn't been a rugby UNION player, they would of called it Rape.
When I was very young and had just started working, a women who I worked with, she was married and in her late 20's, very good looking with a very strong sence of her own entitlement I would have been 19. She would often flirt with me and would try feel my penis through my pants. She once straddled me while I was sitting looked into my eyes and told me that she wasnt wearing underwear. I started to hate going to work, it was a struggle for me because I was bonded to my employer while i was studying and I enjoyed my job. I eventually developed depression, something which has lasted over 20 years. I cant explain why this effected me except that maybe it was the powerlesness of the situation I had found my self in. if the incidents had happened at a party unrelated to work I guess it would have been fine, I could have reacted in any manner I wished. However at work I was trapped, embarresed and humiliated. not least because this women was considered "hot" if I had complaied the guys would have said WTF! however for me there was nothing sexual or erotic about it I just felt as if i was being treated as a piece of meat.
Anonymous, you've just described a very serious case of sexual harassment, which you should have been able to go to someone about. That you felt you couldn't is terrible. I don't really know what to say except I think this is an excellent example of the ways patriarchy hurts men too (in your case, because men are assumed to always want sex, so your refusal wasn't taken seriously.)
Major (ex-Lt Col) Kinsella is (yep still) on the fast track to the top of the NZDF.
He was convicted of sexual assult against a female officer he was instructing on a course. He was demoted. So far, OK clear message sent. Kind of thought he might have lost his job.
The key thing in the sentence is to remeber the Courts Marshall did not accept he dropped his pants and masturbated. The Courts Marshall believed his side of events and his defence that she was a lying slapper. His demotion was backdated 5yrs. That means (if I'm not mistaken) it is a claytons demotion and he will be eligble to be promoted back to Lt Col very shortly as they would have counted he has already served 5yrs as a Major and then be at the top of the promotions list before years end (may be even the finacial yr).
Anon of Feb 26 - that's a horrible situation to have been in. I've been lucky in my worklife not to have faced to many sleazy people, but the feeling of being trapped in a humiliating situation is really unpleasant.
Next Anon - that's an alarming story. It rings a bell - was it all covered by the media, or do courts martial exclude the public?
Kinsellas case was covered in the media.
The implications of his back-dated sentence were not though.
He is a rising star and a quick google search will find his successes praised.
Thanks for that, Anon - I'll follow that up with interest...
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